The Power of Intention

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Have you ever felt like you are losing control of your life, your business or a relationship and you are not sure what happened or how to get it back on track?

I recently felt this way. I took some time to dig deep into myself and figure out what was going on. After some digging I was able to remember a simple practice that helped me fight my way back into the light and take control over my life and projects again. I’ve used this practice in the most challenging moments in my life and in extreme situations. I’ve used this practice in extreme wilderness situations and during panic attacks before going on stage to do stand up comedy. The practice is simple but it is easy to forget to do sometimes.

The practice is this: intention. Being intentional is about embodying who we want to be and making choices aligned with what we want now and in the future. 

Being intentional is about acting, right now, for what we want. Being intentional is about letting go of complaints, excuses and unhealthy beliefs that we are not in control or have no power over the present moment and stepping into mature responsibility and creative action.

Here are a few reminders of ways you can leverage the practice of intention:

  • Set daily intentions. Ask yourself what you want and who you want to be daily and take action. Learn from your mistakes and keep doing it.
  • Take immediate and practical actions. Setting intentions is a waste of time if you don’t act on them. Intention bears fruit through consistent action. For example, if your intention is to be healthy do healthy things immediately including eating a good meal, going for a walk or the gym etc.
  • Act now for the future you want. Our actions now also influence our future. If you have specific things you want in your future, how can you take action today to move closer to that reality?
  • Surround yourself with people and situations with similar intentions. For example, if you want to be healthy, surround yourself with healthy people, spend time in gyms or places that embody that intention and it will strengthen your own practice.
  • Be consistent. Whatever your intentions are you need to act on them consistently for things to change. Sometimes it will be easy, sometimes it will be hard but you need to practice anyway.
Have a great week,

William

Win the Fight Against Distraction and Meaninglessness

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We live in a time of unprecedented distraction. The average professional receives over 100 emails per day in addition to countless social media and personal phone text messages.

Most of this communication is unnecessary and indulgent. Meanwhile our attention is being pulled into other people’s emotions, impulsivity and personal agendas. At the end of the day or week you might be wondering what all this communication was for and if it brought any value to your life or business personally.

We are becoming increasingly conditioned to this chaotic and thoughtless way of communicating. Unless you consciously push back against this communication culture it will increasingly sap your time, energy and ultimately your personal privacy and dignity.

Today I wanted to share a few strategies to reduce unnecessary communication in your life and expand your personal privacy and dignity.

  • Unsubscribe from any communication that does not bring value to your life, including my emails.
  • End conversations. Today‘s manipulative marketing fad is for sales people and marketers to maintain useless conversations with you in the hopes you will eventually buy something. Respectfully end all conversations that are not important to you. Do not keep these conversations going.
  • Only use social media consciously. Do not go on social media unconsciously. Identify any need or intention you have prior to scrolling to see if you can actually get that need met in a more human or mature way or you will at least know why you are scrolling so you can take more control of your behavior and direct it.
  • Turn off your phone, often.  For most people there is no need for your phone to be on all the time. Most messages are not urgent. Turn your phone off for extended periods of time and focus on yourself and what is important to you beyond all this unnecessary communication.
  • Challenge norms. You don’t have to communicate how other people are communicating. Invite people into your own communication preferences. For example, if you don’t want to have a conversation over text message don’t do it and offer another way aligned with your preferences.

I hope these tips can help you defend against the unhealthy and neurotic communication norms of our time.

Have a great week,

William

Difficult Conversations

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What is the most important conversation you need to be having, with yourself, your partner, your colleagues, your friends?

More often than not, in personal life and business the most important conversation gets pushed into the shadows. We avoid it perhaps because we fear change, discomfort or simply don’t feel worthy of having it.

The most important conversations will always ask something of us: more courage, vulnerability, good communication skills, trust in the unknown, but having these conversations is what makes us more human, better leaders, and more empowered.

Morning Rituals

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Morning rituals are important. They set the tone for your day, give you confidence that you have already accomplished valuable things, and in my opinion you should be able to do them anywhere.

A good morning ritual should be transferable to almost any life situation: a prison cell, the forest, a hotel room, the city and any weather condition.

This ritual I do I can do almost anywhere:

– 30 minutes meditation
– 10 minutes of gratitude
– 10 minutes of stretching
– 100 burpees
– Cold shower

The Benefits of Humility

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I recently gave a public talk at Open Door in Montreal which is a weekly event for inmates, ex-inmates and community members, hosted by Communitas, an organization that supports the successful reintegration of those who have spent time in prison.
I spoke about humility and the importance of cultivating humility personally, in relationships and in business.
I shared about my own challenges with humility, practices I use to cultivate humility and some of the practical benefits of humility for relationships, organizational culture and mental health.
Here are some highlights:
– Humility typically increases trust and improves communication and relationships. It is an invitation for more open, mature dialogue.
– In romantic relationships where both partners demonstrate humility there are better psychological and physiological outcomes such as less stress and lower blood pressure. This makes sense because reactivity, misunderstandings, conflict all can lead to stress.
– When leaders demonstrate and act as role models in demonstrating humility followers tend to trust them more and are more loyal.
– Humility is supportive of learning and leadership development. To learn we need to be a student which is essential to develop new skills and knowledge including being a more effective leader or communicator or parent.
– Humility contributes to better mental health and physical outcomes. Research suggests that people who have practices for developing humility have higher tendencies for forgivingness and patience and lower tendencies of negativity. It has also been demonstrated that humility can reduce stress and antisocial behaviour.

The Value of Being Lost

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Once walking on the street in Montreal I came across a homeless man who I met a few times before and I asked him how he was doing. He said, “I’m lost”, and he said it with tears welling up in his eyes and a confidence and vulnerability in his state of being that I’ll never forget.

The confidence and sincerity in his answer moved me. It inspired me to face myself and be more honest with my own lostness at times.

As a man I’ve found it hard to admit when I’m lost to myself and to others. But I have learned that there is much value in being lost. I’ve learned that being lost is simply a part of life, business, creativity, and becoming a better version of myself.

If we never got lost, we would stay the same. If we never got lost, we wouldn’t come up with any new ideas. If we never got lost we might not question ourselves. If we never got lost we would become too arrogant.

It takes courage to be lost in Western culture. We value knowing, having a plan, and confidently directing our lives according to our perfect philosophies. Sometimes lostness arrives as a loving messenger inviting new possibilities for ourselves and our projects and we may come up with even better plans if we listen. In my own experience, it has been periods of lostness that have preceded some of the most meaningful and inspiring changes in my life and career.

Suffering and Pain

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I was recently on The Ridge Journal Podcast with guest host Zackary Paben co-founder of More Heart Than Scars and we discussed leadership, initiation, men’s health, among other things. More Heart Than Scars is a charity that helps those with physical, mental or emotional scars realize they can live beyond them through participating in adventures such as the Spartan Race.

This is a short excerpt about denial of suffering and pain from a longer form podcast that will be released in the near future.

Metaverse Escapism

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I was recently on The Ridge Journal Podcast with guest host Zackary Paben co-founder of More Heart Than Scars and we discussed leadership, initiation, men’s health, among other things. More Heart Than Scars is a charity that helps those with physical, mental or emotional scars realize they can live beyond them through participating in adventures such as the Spartan Race.

In this short clip from our interview we talk about the potential dangers of overindulging the metaverse and the importance of preserving authentic community and human connection.

Privilege

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I was recently on The Ridge Journal Podcast with guest host Zackary Paben co-founder of More Heart Than Scars and we discussed leadership, initiation, men’s health, among other things. More Heart Than Scars is a charity that helps those with physical, mental or emotional scars realize they can live beyond them through participating in adventures such as the Spartan Race.

This is a short excerpt about making best use of privilege versus criticizing ourselves and others for having it. 

Toxic Positivity

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In life and in leadership ‘there will be suffering, joy and intimacy’…

I was recently on The Ridge Journal Podcast with guest host Zackary Paben co-founder of More Heart Than Scars and we discussed leadership, initiation, men’s health, among other things. More Heart Than Scars is a charity that helps those with physical, mental or emotional scars realize they can live beyond them through participating in adventures such as the Spartan Race.

This is a short excerpt about exaggerated positivity from a longer form podcast that will be released in the near future. I talk about intimacy with pain.